What About The Children?
Note: To properly understand the position of the writer please read the author's message "To The Reader".
[19.1]
Few There Be
There will always be a few who will seek to know the ways of the Lord their God, just as Moses did, those who desire to walk in His foot steps. God has, in these times, shaken some who were spiritually sleeping and awakened them. Many of these have begun a journey back to the early church using the New Testament text as both a map and blue print. Many have already begun meeting in homes as they deal with the many hand-me-down doctrines which have kept them bound and divided for years. This is wonderful news but if we don't build an altar of worship in our own homes for our own families, then we build God's church with inferior materials.
[19.2]
As this move of the Spirit continues to draw the brethren back to God's plan, many have discovered difficulties that arise as a result of this decision. They discover that some of the new covenant requirements conflict with some of their established patterns of behavior. Women especially find the new covenant model more confining then they first believed. A closer look at some of these requirements reveals however that none are all that burdensome if properly understood, but some retreat before reaching this understanding in a barrage of excuses, alibis and justifications. In spite of this, many continue to move forward determined to grope their way through years of darkness to find the light of the true New Testament church.
[19.3]
The New Testament Church
The New Testament church must have two visibly practicing parts, though most today only have one. The one most have is a body of believers meeting as a church in a home or building. The other, even more important, is a home meeting as a church. What does that mean? It means that each home must set time aside to function as a church. Dad must not only wear the mantle of father but also that of loving shepherd and spiritual leader of his family.
[19.4]
Today we can't think of church without thinking of Sunday school but I wonder how many realize that Sunday school was born in the early nineteen hundreds and is therefore, relatively new to Christ's two thousand year old church. D. L. Moody and the Chicago YMCA are responsible for its beginning. Surprised? Let's consider a question. Is it better for our children to be taught and nurtured in the Lord by a Sunday school teacher, one we may know little about, or perhaps nothing at all, or should they be nurtured by the parents God has chosen to teach and guide them? Who do you think God will hold accountable for the spiritual feeding of our children, the Sunday school, the teacher, the church assembly or the parents?
[19.5]
Have you noticed that as much as the New Testament speaks about church, it has little or nothing to say about the participation of children within it? Why? Could it be that our church leaders are provided to us for the equipping of the older, mature saints, grown men and women, now ready to assume the work of the ministry? Children are not ready to take the position of disciple; their growth and early training must first begin in the home. Aren't we, as parents, expressly given to our children to train them up in the way they should go? Shouldn't we, as parents take the New Testament message to our family before we take it anywhere else? Why don't we consider setting Friday night (the end of our work week) aside for the edification, worship and fellowship of our natural family? Let's begin to train our school age children how to take their place in family worship and when they demonstrate sufficient maturity, bring them as adults to the church assembly when they're prepared to make a contribution.
Ephesians 4:11-12
11 And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some,
evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers;
12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the
work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:
[19.6]
How many Christians today set aside time in their home to focus this kind of attention on their family? From Adam to Abraham, from Methuselah to Moses, God's children have met Him publicly and from house to house. It wasn't until Moses that God called His people to build a tabernacle of the congregation; a foreshadow of the institutional but temporary church of today. Jesus nor His apostles returned to follow this Old Testament church example but instead returned to worship in its previous meeting place, i.e. the very homes of those who form its congregation.
[19.7]
The true New Testament church is like an equation; it has two sides. If we only build on one side, it will be like a table standing on two legs. If it's to stand, it must be supported equally on both sides. The side that's been missing till now is the home (the natural family) meeting as a church. It takes this to add balance to the churches that meet in homes. Without it, we'll be hearing the same question over and over, i.e. “What about the children?”
[19.8]
Bricks Without Straw
Exodus 5:15-19
15 Then the officers of the children of Israel came and cried unto Pharaoh, saying, Wherefore dealest thou thus with thy servants?
16 There is no straw given unto thy servants, and they say to us, Make brick: and, behold, thy servants are beaten; but the fault is in thine own people.
17 But he said, Ye are idle, ye are idle: therefore ye say, Let us go and do sacrifice to the LORD.
18 Go therefore now, and work; for there shall no straw be given you, yet shall ye deliver the tale of bricks.
19 And the officers of the children of Israel did see that they were in evil case, after it was said, Ye shall not minish ought from your bricks of your daily task.
Pharaoh had lost all reason. Through his misguided, misdirected fear he, with a cruel hand, turned the chosen people of God into his personal slaves. He had forced them into slave labor, building huge monuments to his greatness. These structures were built from hand fashioned brick, made by these oppressed slaves. When the children of God complained that all the available straw, needed for the brick was gone, Pharaoh ordered that no loss in the tally be allowed and that the brick be made without straw. Not only did this prideful ruler bring great suffering on God's chosen people but failed to realize that the durability of the brick would now suffer as well. Brick made with clay and water alone would be brittle and crack easily. There would be nothing within to hold it together. Structures built with Pharaoh's new brick would soon crumble becoming little more than dust. A brickyard that produces poorly made brick, brick with nothing to hold it together, can only give birth to monuments of weakness, those easily brought down. Spiritual stones or bricks, fashioned without straw, those golden threads of love, family unity and faith, have not been properly fashioned and can only introduce weakness to the structure they serve.
[19.9]
Though people today worship in man made structures inappropriately called churches, God never intended this to be so. Some refer to these buildings as houses of God but such a belief can only be considered heresy, a deception designed to lead God's children once again into bondage.
Acts 7:48-50
48 Howbeit the most High dwelleth not in temples made with hands; as saith the prophet,
49 Heaven is my throne, and earth is my footstool: what house will ye build me? saith the Lord: or what is the place of my rest?
50 Hath not my hand made all these things?
[19.10]
God's true dwelling place is within His people, the tabernacle we now call our bodies.
1 Corinthians 3:16-17
16 Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?
17 If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are.
[19.11]
Without any God approved authorization, most believers today have disregarded the freedom given in the new covenant and returned to the old covenant practice of temple and synagogue worship. We have re-established a priesthood and placed them over us, calling them clergy; we have become like the first century churches of Galatia.
Galatians 4:9
9 But now, after that ye have known God, or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, whereunto ye desire again to be in bondage?
Galatians 5:1
5:1 Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.
[19.12]
We are once again building without straw, fashioning brick with our own hands and building our church instead of His. God hasn't instructed us to furnish a habitation for Him with our silver and gold. He has not instructed us to ordain a priesthood and provide its sustenance.
1 Corinthians 3:9-13
9 For we are labourers together with God: ye are God's husbandry, ye are God's building.
10 According to the grace of God which is given unto me, as a wise masterbuilder, I have laid the foundation, and another buildeth thereon. But let every man take heed how he buildeth thereupon.
11 For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ.
12 Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble;
13 Every man's work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man's work of what sort it is.
[19.13]
By building without the straw of love, unity and faith, we have nothing to hold us together; is it any wonder that the church of Jesus Christ is so fragmented, divided by philosophy, science, denominations and false doctrine? This is not the church that Jesus built. Today's church, has not continued in the doctrine of the apostles nor has their doctrine been taught in the homes of its membership.
1 Corinthians 1:10
10 Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.
Acts 2:42
42 And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers.
[19.14]
A Spiritual House
1 Peter 2:5
5 Ye also, as lively stones, are built up a spiritual house, an holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices, acceptable to God by Jesus Christ.
The house of God is built from living stones joined together to form a spiritual house and we, i.e. all true believers, are His holy priesthood offering up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. We read this but we still don't get it. Why? Well…it's either because we're stupid, stubborn or just not listening. Let's focus together now, maybe if we try real hard, we can get it. 1 Peter 2:5 says a spiritual house, a spiritual house, a spiritual house, not a house of wood, brick, stone or cement. It says we are to be a holy priesthood, we are to be, we are to be, not professional priests provided by the denomination or its bible schools or theological seminaries but all believers are to be a holy, royal priesthood forming,…get ready for another new concept; here it comes,…a holy nation of sanctified people.
1 Peter 2:9
9 But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light:
[19.15]
Why royal? Because we've been born again. Born of the spirit into the family of God, a family where Christ is King and we are His heirs begotten in the Spirit. We, by the will of God, have been made princes in God's kingdom, princes and priests. We are, spiritual Israel.
[19.16]
Israel (Strong's #2474 Greek, Strong's #3478 Hebrew) meaning-he will rule, i.e. as a prince. Ethnic Israel is no longer the Israel of God, it has been supplanted by those who, by faith, have been grafted into the family of God by adoption.
Romans 8:14-16
14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father.
16 The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:
Romans 11:19-25
19 Thou wilt say then, The branches were broken off, that I might be graffed in.
20 Well; because of unbelief they were broken off, and thou standest by faith. Be not highminded, but fear:
21 For if God spared not the natural branches, take heed lest he also spare not thee.
22 Behold therefore the goodness and severity of God: on them which fell, severity; but toward thee, goodness, if thou continue in his goodness: otherwise thou also shalt be cut off.
23 And they also, if they abide not still in unbelief, shall be graffed in: for God is able to graff them in again.
24 For if thou wert cut out of the olive tree which is wild by nature, and wert graffed contrary to nature into a good olive tree: how much more shall these, which be the natural branches, be graffed into their own olive tree?
25 For I would not, brethren, that ye should be ignorant of this mystery, lest ye should be wise in your own conceits; that blindness in part is happened to Israel, until the fulness of the Gentiles be come in.
Romans 9:6
6 Not as though the word of God hath taken none effect. For they are not all Israel, which are of Israel:
Romans 2:28-29
28 For he is not a Jew, which is one outwardly; neither is that circumcision, which is outward in the flesh:
29 But he is a Jew, which is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart, in the spirit, and not in the letter; whose praise is not of men, but of God.
[19.17]
A New Covenant And A New Day
A new day has dawned and with it, the revelation that the church has drifted far from its originally designated course. It has abandoned its new covenant, sinking back into the old and has abdicated its priestly responsibilities and given them into the hands of hired men, producing a plastic church, void of real caring. As a result, some of God's people are beginning to awake from their long slumber and have begun to grope their way through the darkness of religiosity, seeking to regain the time and place when last they lived and worshipped under the full counsel of God, a time when they last abode in Christ, continuing steadfastly in the doctrines (teaching) of the apostles.
[19.18]
The Peril Of Darkness
John 3:19-21
19 And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.
20 For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved.
21 But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.
We are to walk as children of light, i.e. children of righteousness and Godly understanding. Many prefer darkness. Some prefer it because their deeds are evil, others because the darkness of ignorance provides an excuse for not obeying God's will and the complete New Testament which, calls us to humility and submission to all of it. How much of the new covenant should we obey? The journey through this dark passage requires sacrifice, surrender and trust, but we have the Holy Spirit to illuminate our path, if we'll let him. Some will stumble on each of the doctrinal stones found lying in their path and abandon the journey. Others, who never counted the cost, will refuse to press on and so remain stunted and lost, refusing to go further, but a few yielded souls will stumble, fall, crawl and scratch their way until at last they see the glimmer of the light of truth. These will become aware, that the way of God is uncovered, not by knowledge or our knowing, but rather, by our continual searching and seeking. The hand of the Holy Spirit will guide us into all truth but we must be willing to take hold of His hand.
[19.19]
The Little Church
The simple, loving New Testament church of the apostles met in the quiet family surroundings of the home. What better place for a spiritual family to meet? Fellowship was rich and the concerns of each of the brethren were promptly addressed as each member took note of the others need and this, was pleasing to the Lord. The assembly became the center of activity and fellowship. Members were inspired to teach, compose music or use the various spiritual gifts given them by the Holy Spirit. They shared their food, shelter and money with any among them in need; some even sold goods, land and other possessions to meet these needs. Among them were tradesmen, fishermen, doctors and scholars, each sharing their skills with those who had need of them. Christ was no longer part of their existance for He had become the very heart of their lives. Church wasn't something to be visited once a week nor was it a special meeting, though indeed, they had one. It was a way of life, a seven day a week interaction with other members of the church family and as they broke bread and shared the same table, their hearts were filled with gladness and thanksgiving. Listen brethren, listen to your hearts and you will hear the Holy Spirit calling you back to the simple, loving church that Jesus built.
[19.20]
The Brickyard Today
In more recent times, Christians have begun gathering in homes after the fashion of the early church. Many have grown tired of the pomp and programs, the strutting preachers, the separation of clergy from laity, the endless quest for power, authority, fame and money. They have taken note that these clay bricks, i.e. the institutional structure made without straw, is beginning to crumble and many of its people are searching for the truth and the true church that Christ and His apostles left us so many years ago. House churches have spontaneously sprung up in many locations around the world as many, have answered the Spirit's call. Today, there are house churches literally scattered across every country on the earth and more are springing up daily.
[19.21]
The Question
One question that has yet to be determined is, will these house churches be built of bricks without straw or will the brick or stones that form them stand the test of adversity, persecution and deception that is already working hard to bring them down?
[19.22]
The Brickyard
Churches are spiritual houses built from living stones. Have you considered what this means? If the local assembly is called a church, then what would comprise the living stones from which the church is built? The answer is obvious, it's built from the families which come together to form it. Each family is a stone or brick and the spiritual church is built up by them. The strength of the church is dependent on the strength of the materials from which it's made. It's said, “that a chain is only as strong as its weakest link” and to this we could add that a church is only as strong as its weakest brick or stone.
[19.23]
Suffer The Little Children
Today's newly born house churches contend with many issues, most of which center around differences in doctrine arising from the diversity of backgrounds from which its membership was formed. One of the biggest issues it faces has little to do with doctrine and yet creates a serious challenge for these fledgling house church families. The question that confronts these precious seekers, the question most often asked is, “What about the children?” Most house church leaders or elders become frustrated when trying to find a solution to this dilemma. What dilemma? Let me explain.
[19.24]
You see, young children, especially toddlers, are a major problem for a small, struggling house church. Babies, i.e. infants remain infants for only a matter of months and, for the most part, sleep during a church meeting. Even if they make a fuss, mom can remove them for a few moments or content them with a bottle or pacifier but toddlers and young children are not so easily controlled or pacified. Many homes are not child proof and children, being what they are, are curious, often leading to correction or giving mom or dad no end of anxiety, embarrassment or concern. The meeting environment often takes on a shrouded spirit as both parents and fellow brethren grow increasingly uncomfortable. The meeting that was designed to edify all, fails to edify any. The children are constantly being threatened or worse. The parents are constantly being distracted or embarrassed and the brethren become the unwilling spectators of this disturbing spectacle. We know in our hearts that things would go a lot smoother without these dear little ones but how can we justify or even suggest their absence? After all, didn't Jesus say, “Suffer the little children to come unto me and forbid them not?”
[19.25]
Older school age children should attend and not only attend, but actually participate in the meeting but toddlers demand attention and will require or even demand it. If we focus our attention on them, we remove it from the Lord and each other. What else can we do? At this point, many attending parents fondly remember the days spent at the institutional church with its building and many facilities. We have come to think of the nursery and Sunday school as an indispensable part of church life. Here, we can drop off the children and actually attend the meeting free of distraction. Many, while recognizing the biblical integrity of the house church, feel they just can't continue in it due to their small children. Some leave it never to return, convinced that it's just not practical for young families.
[19.26]
The Apostolic Church
The church of the apostles, while speaking to many issues affecting life, morality, unity, salvation and service to God, says virtually nothing about children relative to church. Why? Certainly this is, and was, an important issue. If children interrupted the meetings today, they must have done so then. What about the children?
[19.27]
Nurseries And Sunday School
What did our ancestors do with their little blessings? They, most likely, left their babies with their parents while they assembled for church. Perhaps it wasn't their parents but an aunt, cousin, friend or neighbor but they found a trustworthy and safe place to leave them and did so. For an hour or two, two young parents could sit and be spiritually fed, sing praises to the Lord, pray and share the much needed, sweet fellowship of the brethren.
[19.28]
Does this seem hard or inappropriate? When attending an institutional church, we leave our children at Sunday school or the nursery, often with brethren we know little about. The only difference here is a matter of proximity. Here, we're only a few rooms away while in the home church, our children may be across town, but in either case, they're not at the church meeting with us, but instead, are in the care of others. Would you take your baby, or two or three year old child, to an adult institutional church meeting, ignoring the nursery or Sunday school? I think not; so why do we feel we must have them present among the brethren in the house church?
[19.29]
The Easy Way
We know and accept that our children need to be nurtured in the Lord, so it makes sense to us to bring them to the church to accomplish this. After all, we recognize their need for education and send them to school, don't we, …or do we? Many children are leaving the public school system because parents have realized the damage and danger their children are exposed to there. Many are leaving the institutional church system for the same reason. Many parents have chosen to teach school at home and now, are finding that spiritual nurturing is accomplished better in the home as well.
[19.30]
Infants need to be fed a little bit at a time but often. Older children need greater one on one time and need to be taught how to feed themselves spiritually. Parents need to be spiritually fed through the week at bible study and church if they are to continue feeding their children. How can you give water from an empty well? Parents can't give their children what they themselves don't have.
[19.31]
For too long we, as parents, have taken the easy way. We have let others do our work for us. We have abdicated our spiritual responsibility by turning this special privilege over to others but God won't hold others accountable. We'll be the ones called to give account. He didn't make others the parents of our children, He gave the job to us and we chose to ignore this precious privilege and pass it off to surrogates. We took the easy way and the result is now clearly seen in the confusion, lack of commitment and apostasy of our youth. We forget that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world or more pointedly, that the youth of today are tomorrow's church.
The Chief Offender
Proverbs 22:6
6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
[19.32]
The above scripture begins, “Train up a child,” but who is it referring to; whose job is it to train up the child? Is it our pastor's job or one of the elders? Is it the responsibility of the Sunday school teacher or the church in general? The following makes clear who God holds accountable.
Eph 6:4 says. "And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."
Proverbs 1:8 begins, “My son, hear the instruction of thy father,” but what are today's sons hearing when fathers no longer give instruction?
Proverbs 1:10, “My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not.” Good advice for any parent to give their children but most aren't giving it.
Proverb 3:1, “My son, forget not my law; but let thine heart keep my commandments.” What law, what commandments? How can a son or daughter remember the law they haven't been taught, or keep the commandments they haven't been given?
Proverbs 4:10 begins, “Hear, O my son, and receive my saying.” How can a son receive his father's saying when he hasn't been saying anything?
What about Proverbs 4:20, 5:1, 6:20, 7:1?
Proverbs 13:1
13:1 A wise son heareth his father's instruction: but a scorner heareth not rebuke.
[19.33]
If a son is made wise by his father's instruction, what shall become of a son that receives no spiritual instruction? Will he then become a scorner?
Proverbs 23:26
26 My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.
[19.34]
Today we leave the hearts of our sons and daughters in the hands of others and rarely even check the results.
[19.35]
Fashioning Strong Brick
Churches are fashioned from the materials found in the brickyard, bricks that have been hand fashioned for construction. Strong bricks will contribute to the building of a strong house. The children we raise and fashion are the substance of tomorrow's church.
A Piece Of Clay
I took a piece of molding clay
And idly fashioned it one day
And as my fingers pressed it, still
It moved and yielded to my will
I came again when days had past
The bit of clay was hard at last
The form I gave it, it still bore
And I could fashion it no more
I took a piece of living clay
And gently pressed it day by day
Molding with my power and art
A young child's soft and yielding heart
I came again when years had gone
It was a man I looked upon
He still that early impress bore
But I could fashion him no more.
[19.36]
The bricks of the church are fashioned in the family; each family must take its position in the church structure and the spiritual strength of that family will determine the strength of the church it serves.
[19.37]
Children should hear each parent saying grace at every meal, when they are not saying grace themselves. Children should be accustomed, early in life, to praying with their family and when alone as well. Older children should take part in the spiritual nurturing of younger ones. Parents should be observed discussing the bible, praying and teaching. Parents should set time aside for one on one conversations with each of their children and mothers should lead their children at breakfast in prayer and the reading of the proverb of the day (perhaps as given in the NLT). Spiritual music should be heard frequently coming from recordings, as normal household activity continues. This is especially appreciated in the kitchen as meals are being prepared.
[19.38]
A maximum effort should be made to see that the entire family is seated together at the supper (dinner) table and children should be heard as well as being seen. Laughter and rich conversation should permeate every family meal. Children should be given the verbal opportunity to enter into the daily affairs of their parents and parents should likewise have the opportunity to enter into the children's day, hear their views, listen to their opinions and observe their thinking. It's a wonderful way to see how your children are developing on a number of levels. Conversation which involves the bible, Christian conduct or views, should be encouraged whenever possible, especially when initiated by the children.
[19.39]
One special night each week should be set aside as family night. Outside interests should be set aside by children and parents alike. Incoming phone calls should be left to the answering machine and outgoing calls prohibited. Guests may be invited but should be limited to those who are relatives or special friends of the family. Your children's friends may be invited but only if they have your approval and the approval of their parents.
[19.40]
Family Night
The make-up of the activity taking place on family night may vary from family to family. It may fluctuate from week to week but at its heart, Christ should reign supreme. There should be short bible stories taught by dad with contributions made by mom and older siblings. Younger children might contribute a memory verse or Christian chorus. If any play an instrument, it should be included. Surprise contributions, such as spontaneous skits or amateur, one act plays, which demonstrate a moral or spiritual truth should be strongly encouraged. Home made cakes or cookies made by mom or some of the older children would be a welcomed contribution especially if accompanied by some parent supplied ice cream. A good brisk game of bible trivia with prizes awarded to winners is one way to have fun and grow in knowledge of God's word at the same time. This is a good way for a family to interact with each other and there are trivia games available which are suitable for all age levels. Parents can even create their own list of trivia questions if they feel so inclined. Family evening will seem to pass quickly with its songs, stories, prayer, instruction and games, topped off with prizes and special dessert treats. One on one time or family discussions on a given issue might also spark interest. With an evening like this each week, could any parent feel guilty about not taking the little ones to adult church? Would you feel your children were being spiritually ignored or would you consider them well fed, fashioned and strengthened in the Lord? Wouldn't you feel you had added the necessary bonding, i.e. straw to the family brick that's necessary to strengthen the church? Wouldn't you feel that, as parents, you had done your job in the brickyard by contributing to the strength of the materials fashioned there?
[19.41]
Sunday School
Perhaps one of the greatest spiritual tools ever used to touch the heart of a child is Sunday school, or Sabbath school if you prefer. Millions of children have benefited from this remarkable ministry. It was never meant to supplant the spiritual instructions given in the home but it has. Perhaps it would have been wiser not to have linked it with the church meeting.
[19.42]
Many children that come from godless homes are rounded up each week and brought to a place where, with parental permission, they are taught about the love of God and the saving power of Christ's sacrifice. This vital ministry needs to continue both in the institutional church system and in the homes of individual families. The unsaved children of your friends, neighbors or the childhood acquaintances of your children should not go unnoticed or neglected. These spiritually deprived little ones need to be gathered up and taken in; let's remember them on family night as well.
[19.43]
Single Parents
1 Timothy 5:4
4 But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents: for that is good and acceptable before God.
[19.44]
Some Christian parents are left alone when their mate passes away. Other brethren become Christians after going through a divorce, while others were abandoned by their spouse who was drawn back into the world and many were simply deceived by mates that professed belief but did so as a means of self-gratification. How can one living as a widow or widower create a church atmosphere within the home? If only two exist under one roof, i.e. mom and child or dad and child, it's not ideal but it's enough. With God all things are possible. Remember, Christ is in your midst when only two or three are gathered together.
Matthew 18:20
20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
[19.45]
If possible, it might be profitable to gather together with a saved brother or sister and their family or with another same sex, single parent who is also seeking fellowship. Family night can be a welcome and necessary diversion, a special blessing, especially among single parents. It provides badly needed fellowship for the parents and a spirit of celebration and joy for the entire family.
2 Timothy 1:1-7
1 Paul, an apostle of Jesus Christ by the will of God, according to the promise of life which is in Christ Jesus,
2 To Timothy, my dearly beloved son: Grace, mercy, and peace, from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.
3 I thank God, whom I serve from my forefathers with pure conscience, that without ceasing I have remembrance of thee in my prayers night and day;
4 Greatly desiring to see thee, being mindful of thy tears, that I may be filled with joy;
5 When I call to remembrance the unfeigned faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and thy mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also.
6 Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee by the putting on of my hands.
7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
[19.46]
One of the most fruitful early Christians was the spiritual son of the apostle Paul. It is generally believed that Timothy's father had either passed away or abandoned Timothy's mother. In either case, Timothy was raised in a solid Christian atmosphere within the home provided for him by his mother Eunice and his grandmother, Lois. Under their obedient and loving care, Timothy was properly prepared to further his walk in Christ when God called him to serve, and what a mighty servant he became. God fills all voids. He delights in using broken things and bringing healing to those who truly love and serve Him.
Matthew 12:20
20 A bruised reed shall he not break, and smoking flax shall he not quench, till he send forth judgment unto victory.
[19.47]
If there's one thing you can be sure of, it's that our riches in this life are not measured in the coin of this realm but in the treasures laid up in the next, where Christ alone is King. Remember, He numbers the hairs on our head and sees the sparrow that falls and He considers use more valuable than many sparrows.
Matthew 10:29-31
29 Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.
30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered.
31 Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.
Jesus said, “Suffer the little children to come unto me.” The Christ in you, mom or dad, may be the only Christ that your child may see, let your light shine, so they can glorify Him. Suffer the little children to come unto the Christ in you.
[19.48]
Sand Or Rock
When God had completed His work in Christ, He had fashioned two families. First, He created the natural family., the family of man, then, from these earthly families, He built His spiritual house and called it His church. He built His spiritual house on a rock, the stone that the builders rejected, the stone that became the chief cornerstone of His spiritual family, the church.
[19.49]
Man was brought into the natural family through birth, a birth which he had no control over. However, man could only enter the second family by choice, a choice to be re-born in the Holy Spirit, a gift made available by God's grace and received through our faith in His only begotten Son. It is important for us to understand that without the first birth, the second would be impossible thus, unless a man is born of water (birth water, i.e. amniotic fluid) and Spirit; he cannot enter the kingdom of God. Man cannot enter the kingdom of God being born once. He must be born a second time, in the Spirit; he must be born again.
John 3:5-6
5 Jesus answered, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.
6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.
[19.50]
The church, God's spiritual house, is built with living stones, those individuals and families that have experienced this re-birth, a re-birth in which old things have passed away and all things have become new, now forms the very spiritual dwelling place of God. How can God's house be built without spiritual brick, i.e. those individuals and families that form its spiritual structure? Many today have attempted to build His church but have followed their own plans, ignoring His. They have formed it of those re-born and those yet unregenerated (unsaved). Together, they have fashioned a house built of natural materials, of wood, cement and stone and have called it God's house or His church. They have fashioned it as well with religious brick that does not contain the unifying straw of the Holy Spirit by including in their numbers unsaved members, placing them along side brick made and held together with the straw of God's Holy Spirit. Such houses are soon brought down, for the Spirit of God dwells only in the hearts of the redeemed and most certainly does not inhabit temples made with hands. Brick, made without straw, will soon crumble even when bricks made with straw are standing side by side with them.
2 Corinthians 6:14-18
14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,
18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.
Acts 7:48-50
48 Howbeit the most High dwelleth not in temples made with hands; as saith the prophet,
49 Heaven is my throne, and earth is my footstool: what house will ye build me? saith the Lord: or what is the place of my rest?
50 Hath not my hand made all these things?
[19.51]
God's Spiritual House
Many today have opted to return to the simpler, more loving and giving church of the apostles. This church didn't invest in wood, hay or stubble. It didn't separate God's people into classes, i.e. clergy and laity. It didn't divide God's nation into factions called denominations. Many now gather from house to house just as it was done in the first century church but, it too is destined to follow an equally man made path if, it doesn't steadfastly follow the doctrine (teaching) of the apostles, and stop making excuses for not following it fully.
Acts 2:42
42 And they continued stedfastly in the apostles' doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers.
[19.52]
Moreover, like the institutional church it left behind, some home grown churches, have forgotten about brick made without straw. Some have focused on erecting a spiritual house while largely ignoring the quality of materials being used in its construction. The church began with Christ, He is the cornerstone but those stones which follow, are formed in the brickyard. The brickyard that produces these materials we call the home or family. If today's move back to the early church does not wake up and begin to focus on the family, it too will be built of nothing but clay, i.e. flesh, and the straw, i.e. the Holy Spirit needed to hold it together will, be lost due to the failure of the home to include Him.
[19.53]
God has left a void in the New Testament house church. He has not spoken specifically about the roll of children (young children) within it. The reason for this is obvious, or it should be. Little children, if brought to the church assembly, create a problem that affects the church as a whole. The scriptures admonish us to do all things to the edifying of the body and do them decently and in order. When young children are added to this environment, the result is anxiety, frustration, disruption and often, to our shame, anger. Even the institutional church recognizes this. It's why they have junior church, Sunday school and nursery care. If it weren't for these provisions, normal worship would be adversely affected with the result being confusion and we know that God is not the author of confusion.
1 Corinthians 14:33
33 For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints.
[19.54]
Thoughtful Preparation
Finding a safe, secure place to leave your young children takes time and thought. Often grandparents are not only suitable, but eager to see their grandchildren for a couple hours each week. It may be that an aunt, uncle, cousin, close friend or a well known neighbor is willing to do this for you. Perhaps a well respected older woman or widow needing a little extra income might be willing to care for them. In a situation such as this, each has needs being met by the other making the relationship symbiotic. In cases involving payment, I would suggest that what was planned as a gift to God (as an offering) be used to pay for the care of your children; let them be your gift to the Lord just as Hannah did (1 Samuel 1:10-20). Single parents that can't afford such child care could alternate weeks with another single parent, each taking a turn attending church. Where there's a will, there's always a way.
[19.55]
What Age?
Children are not stamped out with a cookie cutter, they're different. Some of the brightest little ones are the most curious and often become the most difficult to control. Some, by nature, have a quieter, more contemplative spirit and will settle down but somewhere between the age of seven and twelve, most children can be included in the church assembly. I'm not talking about keeping them quiet with games or coloring books but of including them into the worship along with the adults. This means giving them an opportunity to share in this spiritual feast, they too must come prepared to bring some spiritual food to the table.
[19.56]
Child Preparation
When children have been properly nurtured in the brickyard of the home, they're much more likely to arrive at the level of preparation needed to become an active, functioning member, of the church. It is not the responsibility of the church to build up our children; that's our job. It's our responsibility to prepare our children to build up the church. We must make certain that our children are made of the right spiritual stuff. The spiritual structure of our church depends on the material that we, as parents, supply. As a family, we must stand strong, united and prepared to take our place in the spiritual structure of the church, the life of our church depends on the brick it's built from. It will stand or fall on the material we supply, the brick we are as a family. Our children are our greatest gift to the church, thus they are very important to God.
Matthew 18:5-6
5 And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me.
6 But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
[19.57]
Why Some House Churches Fail
There is no such thing as a one sided equation. Some things, like mathematical equations, simply can't exist without their other complementing side. We need two shoes for our feet, two lenses for our glasses, two gloves for our hands and, no matter what the world says, two opposite sex adults to make a marriage and a home.
[19.58]
Though few have realized it, there are two elements necessary to sustain a healthy church. First and foremost, we must have spiritual families made up of parents and children who center their relationship within the home on Christ. They must abide in Him and follow His word as the Holy Spirit gives them revelation, i.e. new light. Such families constitute the very fabric of the church and without strong spiritual families, a church, no matter how well organized or how sound its doctrine will, in time, crumble, giving way to apostasy. As its families go, so goes the church.
[19.59]
The other side of this dual structure deals with the relationships that are spawned between families. To build enduring relationships, certain basic elements must be appropriated. There must be unity born of love, faithfulness, patience and sound doctrine. There must also be a commitment to submit to God, His word and each other. We must remain open and teachable; always seeking to find new light in God's word but never attempting to read between its lines. God means what He says and says what He means. We must never add, subtract or change the doctrine of Christ or those He gave authority to record His written word. We must not attempt to circumvent it in any way but rather follow it with a desire in our heart to please Him thus, we must obey Him with joy and gladness and not grudgingly. Such service comes from our trust in Him, it is fruit that naturally comes forth from our position in Him, fruit born from faith.
[19.60]
The Three Sided Equation
The two sided equation previously described here is an illusion, it only appears to have two sides, in reality, it has three. First each individual member of a natural family must abide in Christ, “For in Him we live, and move, and have our being” (Ac 17:28). From these individual family members comes the strands of love that intertwine with other family members to form a true, loving family relationship. The family likewise, comes into oneness with other families that build yet another relationship intertwined with each other and all, individually and collectively, continue to build their relationship with God; this is a church! What do you call an assembly made up of disunified families that gather in Jesus name, one that calls itself a church? You might call it an optimistic experiment, possibly a pseudo-Christian sect, who knows? What do you think we should call it? Perhaps more importantly, what do you think Jesus would call it?
[19.61]
Man To Man
Men, if you don't have Christ in your home, you don't have Him in your heart either. Why not just say it plainly; if Christ isn't preeminent in your home sir, you're not saved! A man who is saved could never allow his family to walk in sin or in ignorance. He would know and realize the implications of John 3:18 and what it would mean to his unequipped family. Could any man who is truly of God allow his family to by-pass eternal life and, in so doing, suffer eternal death and separation from God?
[19.62]
It's time to tell it like it is, to stop hiding the truth. It's time to be a man and take responsibility for our family. It's time we stopped handing off this God given privilege to others and stand up to be counted. If we truly believe in Jesus Christ, we couldn't possibly stand by and watch our family go into apostasy, losing their chance to enter God's kingdom.
Sheep
‘Twas a sheep, not a lamb, that strayed away
In the parable Jesus told;
A grown up sheep that had gone astray
From the ninety and nine in the fold;
Out on the hillside, out in the cold
‘Twas a sheep the Good Shepherd sought;
And back to the flock, safe in the fold
‘Twas a sheep the Good Shepherd brought.
And why for the sheep should we earnestly long,
And as earnestly hope and pray?
Because there's a danger if they go wrong
They will lead the lambs astray.
For the lambs will follow the sheep, you know
Wherever the sheep may stray;
When the sheep go wrong, it will not be long
Till the lambs are as wrong as they
And so with the sheep we earnestly plead,
For the sake of the lambs today;
If the lambs are lost, what terrible cost
Some sheep will have to pay!
[19.63]
We're on this earth for eight to nine decades, more or less, but eternity is forever. What does it profit if we gain the whole world and loose our own souls (Mark 8:36) or allow his loved ones to pass into oblivion? Fathers, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen and if you can't spiritually take care of your family, maybe its time you stop calling yourself a Christian and get out of the church; you're really not in it anyway. I've quoted this before and I'll quote it again, “Don't tell me what you believe, show me how you live and I'll tell you what you believe.” Let's get off the bench (the church bench) and get into the game. That's where the action is. It's time to put our lives where our mouth is. Dads, can you hear the Lord asking, “What about the children?” Dad, what about your children?
[19.64]
Where Church Begins
Church doesn't begin at the corner in the steepled building. It doesn't even begin in a house. Church begins in your heart. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit if you're a believer, that's where church begins. It must fill your home and your family before it can be taken on the road. It must exist in the hearts of each family member; each family and each assembly that gathers as a church community. It begins within, unseen, and like a beautiful flower, it grows and spreads until it has become a garden paradise that all can see.
[19.65]
The church doesn't need a steeple, stained glass, pulpit, altar or pews. It doesn't even need a house or any building made of wood or stone. All that it really needs is you and me; remember, He's in our midst with just two or three. You, me and Him; that's all we need providing we come together with love, in faith believing, seeking truth with open, teachable hearts, willing to study His word, test the spirits and endure temptation and persecution. Of course, we that come must come prepared to put our faith into action, willing to serve others as we would Jesus. Our participation in His church must far exceed mere attendance. From the record of our past, it appears more likely that we've been building our church, our way, after abandoning His. It's time now to return to the church that Jesus built and it begins with answering the question, “What about the children?”
[19.66]
Spiritual Genetics
In our natural family, we share genetics. We take on the appearance and traits passed down from generation to generation and so it is in our spiritual development as well. What we pass to our children in this generation will be passed to the next. If all that our children see in us is a form of godliness accompanied by churchianity, that's likely all they'll pass down to theirs. If we are led by the Spirit of God, we can break this superficial genetic chain through re-birth and take on the genetic character of Christ and the apostles. When we submit to the guidance and teaching of the Holy Spirit, we'll find ourselves miraculously speaking the same thing, with no divisions among us, completely joined together in the same mind and opinion. These are the spiritual genetics that typify and identify the members of the family of God (1 Corinthians 1:10).
[19.67]
Yes, you'll know His disciples by their love (John 13:35), their sacrifice (Luke 14:33), their faith (James 2:17, 18), their obedience (1 John 2:3, 4) and their fruit (John 15:8). These are the genetic characteristics, the markers that reveal our true spiritual, genetic lineage; from this we can determine if we are true decedents of Abraham or just usurpers, claiming to be the heirs of Christ (John 8:39, Romans 4:13-18, Galatians 3:7).
[19.68]
Fathers
Fathers, God has appointed you to be the shepherds of your homes but the choice is yours. You can lead your family as a loving shepherd or be its most corrupting sheep. Either way, your family will likely follow.
[19.69]
Have Patience
Time heals many problems or so it's said. This may or may not be true but with respect to children, time brings change, growth and maturity. As parents, we need to do nothing more than plant, feed and add water. Plant (the word of God), feed (with sound doctrine) and water (with love) and they will grow older and hopefully, wiser. We need to plant the word of God in each and wait and watch for the fruit of faith to manifest itself. Yes, feed them good spiritual food daily. Water them liberally with love and sincere prayer. Embrace them with rich fellowship and provide good, protective oversight. We must reflect the example Christ modeled for us. We must disciple our children so they're prepared to teach others, to teach others (2 Timothy 2:2). Finally, we must allow them to take their place in the assembly of believers in the midst of this hostile world, so they can be the light and salt they were meant to be. If we fail to fashion brick made with straw, the kingdom of God will survive but some of the little churches that meet in a house may not.